the short of it:
Thoughts are unimportant, but actions are vital.
49. The Virtue of Indulgence.
The sage has no invariable mind of [their] own; [they make] the mind of the people [their] mind.
The good I would meet with goodness. The not-good I would also meet with goodness. Virtue is good. The faithful I would meet with faith. The not-faithful I would also meet with faith. Virtue is faithful.
The sage dwells in the world with a timid reserve; but [their] mind blends in sympathy with all. The people all turn their ears and eyes up to [them]; and the sage thinks of them all as [their] children.
49. ‘The Quality of Indulgence.’
49.1 The sage has no invariable mind of [their] own; [they make] the mind of the people [their] mind.
49.2 To those who are good (to me), I am good: and to those who are not good (to me), I am also good; -and thus (all) get to be good. To those who are sincere (with me), I am sincere; and to those who are not sincere (with me), I am also sincere; -and thus (all) get to be sincere.
49.3 The sage has in the world an appearance of indecision, and keeps [their] mind in a state of indifference to all. The people all keep their eyes and ears directed to [the sage], and [the sage] deals with them all as [their] children.
49. The Virtue (Teh) of Trust.
The wise [person] has no fixed heart; in the hearts of the people [they find their] own. The good [they treat] with goodness; the not-good [they] also [treat] with goodness, for teh is goodness. The faithful ones [they treat] with good faith; the unfaithful [they] also [treat] with good faith, for teh is good faith.
The wise [person] lives in the world but [they live] cautiously, dealing with the world cautiously. [They universalize their] heart; the people give [them] their eyes and ears, but [they treat] them as [their] children.
The Long of It:
The paradox of Chapter 49 lies between what you are thinking and what you are doing.
Treat everyone like children, caring honestly about what they care about. Nod your head and smile at everything understandingly. This is what Lao Tsu refers to as having the heart/mind* of the people.
However, sages do not let people guide their actions anymore than a responsible parent would let their child guide theirs. Instead they always act in the best interest of the person, despite the person and, less importantly, despite what other people think.
-TB
*See xin (emotion/reason)- the source of human cognition.
